A busy country doctor often covered the thirty kilometers to the nearest hospital with more regard for expediency than the
speed limit. One day, he took his five-year-old son along for the ride when he went to make hospital rounds. Afterwards, his
wife asked their son if he had enjoyed it. ‘It was neat,’ replied the son. ‘A nice man on a motorcycle stopped us and wrote
father a prescription.’
••••••••••
Wife reading husband’s fortune card from scale: ‘You are a leader, with a magnetic personality and strong character. You
are intelligent, witty and attractive to the opposite sex.’ She paused, ‘It has your weight wrong too.’
••••••••••
It was their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary, and he promised her anything she wanted.
‘Do you remember when you proposed to me?’ she said. ‘You got down on your knees and said, “I love you.” That’s what I’d
like you to do again.’
‘Are you kidding?’ he frowned.
‘No. I’m serious.’
‘Okay,’ he said as he got down on both knees. ‘Dear, I love you; now help me up!’
••••••••••
Moving along a dimly lit street, a person was suddenly approached by a stranger who had slipped from the shadows
nearby.
‘Please, sir,’ asked the stranger, ‘Would you be so kind as to help a poor unfortunate fellow who is hungry and out of work?
All I have in the world is this gun.’
••••••••••
‘I’m sorry,’ said the judge. ‘Your daughter’s only fifteen, Mrs. Cove. I just can’t issue a marriage license to her’.
‘Judge,’ said Mrs. Cove unhappily, ‘are you telling me my daughter’s too young to do what she’s already gone and done?’
••••••••••
Men who are getting on in years should console themselves with the thought that when they get too old to set bad examples,
they can always start giving advice.
••••••••••
A fellow just bought a car. His wife went with him on a few expeditions, and did not hesitate to criticize his driving.
‘Hello, old man!’ said a neighbor one evening. ‘I see you’ve got a car. What do you get out of her?’
‘About forty thousand words to the gallon,’ answered the husband.
